Belated Guide to having a Great Weekend

First, realize that the weekend - even the long variety - is never long enough. Every second away from the daily grind is precious, so economize your time. One suggestion I can make is, shave a few minutes from your morning routine by shaving your head. You will not need to worry about combs or hair gel, will experience a peculiar light-headed sensation without the assistance of any substance, and the reactions are priceless when you go from "getting a bit shaggy" to "just got back from chemo" (to maximise said reactions, wear a hat).

Secondly, use this recipe for an amazing party:

- 1 fine Friday evening
- 1 house in Hull with a Depaneur two doors down and a bar a block away
- 1 Large group of people, preferrably those who own and/or can play a musical instrument. Try to make this group of people grow during the week. Be as enticing as possible - mention the girl with the nice maracas. If they are still unsure, assure them that she will let them play with her maracas.
- 1 stereo system with good music to play along with - 'Lighning Crashes' is a prime example.

Raid the depaneur for beer, drink, play music - in the words of Bob Dylan, play fucking loud. Take a break at some point in the late night/early morning to grab some poutine or drop by the bar for a bit. Return to the house and drink and play some more until the sun comes up. Repeat this whole process every second friday if not every friday.

Thirdly, take Saturday to recuperate from the hangover, the guitar playing (finger picking) related blisters, and the insanely sore right knee ( how the hell did THAT happen?). Have a movie night with a few friends. Watch 'Harvey Birdman' Volume 1 and 'Waiting'. Do yourself a favour and skip watching 'Syriana' - you'll likely just end up slightly confused by story lines which never seem to converge, bored by cliches, and two hours older.

Fourthly, given that Saturday you took it easy, Sunday is once again a good time to have some drinks with friends, though definitely not in such a grand way as friday. Have a beer and pizza night. Watch some more Harvey Birdman, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, and listen to some live George Thorogood. If the weekend if of the long variety, you'll have time tomorrow to clean and do laundry. If not, you always have that 'Slacker 101' shirt you can wear to the office until you get a writeup saying otherwise.